Wednesday, July 03, 2013


....because i am such an idiot.
here we go, here we go






Will be with you after this break. In the meantime PEW PEW PEW

Thursday, June 27, 2013

And On This Corner...

Dear Darya

You know what is my biggest peeve as of late;  people, or should I say PARENTS making comparisons. What's worse is when they start comparing their kids with others. Especially annoying when the parents speak proudly or even close to acting all smugly of the achievements and milestones their children had conquered without realizing they come off as bragging and making the other party feel small.

Good for you that your buncha spawn are born heavier, well behaving, can crawl at the age of a day or walk faster, speak better, know how to use the cutleries...right out of your/wife's vagina.

I am sure these parents don't realize the damage they WILL do with the kids when they grow up. They do not realize the jokes they thought were harmless might come off as mockery. Stop this competition people. Come on, live and let die. The wee ones are not even bloody 2! This is bullying! Of course, they won't understand the amount of crap you are spewing out of your pie-hole, but one day, those words will break them. Insecurities happen because YOU started it.

"Ha-ha what language is she/he talking in?! Can you speak properly!? Haha, (insert name of bully parent's child and include him/her in the mocking) look, she/he is talking gibberish! Teach her/him to talk!" 

"Ooh my child can walk before she/he was out from my womb! Yours can't at 1 year? Why? Are you not training him/her to walk?"

"What! Your kid is born earlier but my child is heavier than yours? Did you not feed her well?"

"My kid is not clingy and needy because we don't practice co-sleeping. We let him/her cry it out and don't carry her/him much. My kid is more badass than yours"

"Oh my, your kid is so unfriendly! Mine likes being around people! Why is she screaming like that? My kids are so well behaving they know when to be playful and when to be quiet"

Call me (ultra) sensitive I do not care, for this is my child you are making fun of. If my child fall behind her milestone, obviously I would go seek help. Why fret when you are progressing slow and steady. 

I applaud at the uniqueness and the superhuman speed progress of your child. 

I am so happy and proud of you! YeyYey. I am so clapping enthusiastically, you see? You see??!

Let me give a slow clap...

...on your face for that.

And then I got this on my twitter:

Never react emotionally to criticism. Analyse & correct yourself to determine whether it is justified.

*breathes in deep, exhales*
That is why, ladies and germs, I don't open a can of whoopass on you.

So stop bullying on little humans, please. 

I am yours to keep
Umi thinks she can play superhero and protects her Darya from evil

you and i, we will kick some bullies' butt.

Wednesday, June 26, 2013

Wordless Wednesday//The Super Short Hello, Goodbye Episode.

This won't be a wordless one. Another Wordy Wednesday here we go, here we go.

Dear Darya

Your Aby was away in London for 3 weeks. He came back for 2 nights and off he goes off to West Indies for another 5 weeks (Jamaica, Barbados, Trinidad & Tobago the works *gives him the evil eye*) last Sunday.

You should have seen me bawl my eyeballs out at the airport and all through Sunday night. 

Well this is pretty depressing. The entire family is leaving me! Well except for your Nenek of course. She has to stand in and be on Darya duty while me, your Umi runs off to work. Your Ami Dax will fly off to Berlin and god knows where in Europe and Doha end of this month. Your Mama Eza is flying off to Melbourne this Friday for 2 weeks and your Ya'i is heading off to Bogor, Indonesia for a month.

My entire family is a bunch of wanderers.

Aby and I managed to get some sneaky date, at midnight in the living room. Hah. So we catch up on gossips (muahaha tsk tsk) over the folding of laundry, ironing them and packing of his luggage all the way till 6am. I don't want to sleep, I just want to cling on to him and not let him go. Yea possessive eh?  

Aby or not Aby, life a Mother's duty still goes on for puffy eyes red-nosed Umi. 

It's just you and me baby for this month of Ramadhan.

I am yours to keep
Stay Puff Eyed Red Nosed Umi-dear

p/s: it's madness with the 13hours time difference BUT we managed to speak twice in a day because of that. I get to talk to him when I am on my way to work and it would be his evening 7pm, my 8am. Then I get to catch up again during his breakfast time; 8am his time 9pm my time. That would do babe, that would do <3

p/p/s: of course i am stalking my husband here Nongkie Goes Places then froth in my mouth with jealousy

My babies

aby on darya duty, chasing and running after her. i sat back, sip my cuppa coffee and snapping photos because soon, the entire 5 weeks i will be on solo parenting duty. uwaa.

we managed to go out and escaped the haze on Saturday.
wee. a short date out with the family.

umi aby on a midnight date, in the living room.

the day before your aby left.

So, Aby, if i sit long enough on your luggage, will you stay?

mayday mayday kid missing her aby, and soon ami!

yea yea come see my sexy puffed face look.
i seriously bawled my eyeballs out of my socket for the entire night your aby left.

here's you, playing darya the mellow the whole of Monday

The Misadventures of the Masked Mother & The Great Singapore Haze

Dear Darya

The past 2 weeks brought tears to my eyes. Not of sadness and sorrow but from the haze. I had to breathe and brave (ceh ceh ceh!) through the hazy days in teary eyes, sore throats and headaches. Last week it hit 400 plus but I guess the PSI Index lied to us, my feelings cheated. It sure felt like 40000 to me. 

Bring out the gas mask people! 

We were told to stay indoors, shut our windows and doors and die from suffocating in the heat and haze. I felt like a piece of baked chicken, skewered and slowly rotating in the oven, prisoned in my own home.

The gahmen (government) told us to man up and stop being pussies. Ok that was not exactly what they said but close. So we were told life goes on amidst the state of emergency. Keep calm and breathe in the toxic air

As a Singaporean who is only  good at our whines and complains, what is the next best thing we can do? Wiped out the whole shop selling N95 masks and air purifiers. I have seen people in Singapore buying boxes of masks. What the hell they do with the excess? Cup their breasts  and balls with them?

Cloud seeding was done and yesterday we seen hail, rain and storm creating havoc on the west side of Singapore. The season in Singapore should go HOT-HOT-HOTTER-HAZE-HAIL- STORM-HOT-HELL.

I wonder what they do with all those masks and purifiers now that the haze has subsided? 

I am yours to keep
Umi the Singaporean Rantor

I wish I hadn't thrown away this gas mask. I would look awesome in it, taking the train and giving the F-up face inside the mask. ahahahha
. So I settled for camouflaging my face.

Surgical mask don't really work well in the hazardous state we were in. Were told to stay indoors and baked ourselves silly in our own home. Playing the Foot Soldiers (TMNT) here. 

no these shots were not of Genting Highlands or any cold foggy places
welcome to the hazepore
photos credit: +Inda Malini & +Norashikin Ahmad 
snapshots taken from their office.